I'm Renée Yvonne. I'm a Gen Xer.
I went to Catholic school where I was taught that masturbation would cause you to go blind. And our sex education was basically the opposite of Nike, "Don't Do It!" I figured sex must be amazing because no one wants us to have sex, but everyone was simultaneously trying to have sex.
I just knew we were going to have issues when we grew up.
In our senior year of high school, we were required to take a class called Marriage. We never discussed sex in the Marriage class which seemed odd since we were only supposed to have sex while married. Instead we spent the entire semester picking out dresses, cakes, and invitations to our future wedding. (I remember thinking, what a waste of time. This stuff will be out of date by the time I get married.) But no one talked about sex in terms of pleasure. We didn't know what the mechanics of sex were or how to please a partner. We basically learned about sex from cable TV and our clueless friends.
So when I got into relationships where the sex was less than satisfying, I knew why.
How could it not be? But how do you talk about it with your partner? How do you tell them what you need?
We barely knew what we wanted.
It seems like it should be simple but it's not that easy sometimes because you don't want to hurt them. And so on you go with pleasure-less sex or worse no sex at all.
As we got into our 40s and 50s, I noticed more and more women and men saying that sex wasn't as satisfying or their partner wasn't interested. They were at a loss and wanted to fix it. They would talk to me and I'd do some research and get them an answer. And they would thank me later for the advice.
Being a Capricorn, I thought I need to be getting paid for this. And that's when I realized I found my next career! So I began studying clinical sexuality at Sex Coach University with Dr. Patti Britton. And this opened my eyes to how I can help Gen Xers and Baby Boomers maintain a blissful sex life as we age.
I would love to help you if you are not experiencing the pleasure you want in your sex life. Click here to ask me almost anything about sex.
I look forward to hearing from you because you deserve to have blissful intimacy and sex in your relationship so you are a happier and more delightful human!
My Mission(ary) Statements
My mission(ary) statement is about creating a future of pleasure for grown folks. It keeps me grounded on why I do this work. If you relate, check out my blog, my podcast, take a workshop or ask a question you are dying to have answered.
And now, here are my mission statements.
I want to create a world....
- of grown folks who are experiencing pleasure, sexually, emotionally, and physically
- where we feel comfortable talking about sex and sexuality as easily as we discuss food or our jobs
- where we teach our offspring about pleasure and sex from a healthy perspective and not from fear
- where couples ask for what they need rather than hope their partners figure it out.
- where sex isn't taboo but treated as a normal healthy part of being human.
- where women can express their sexuality and not be called or made to feel like sluts, whores or thots but rather women who enjoy and prioritize their pleasure
- where couples are brave enough to communicate, have fun, be adventurous, and curious about trying new things.
- where couples who aren't happy and satisfied sexually are willing to make the changes to achieve and prioritize their pleasure
- where people know you are never too old to explore and enjoy sex
- where penis-in-vagina sex is not the only definition of sex
- where people try new things, celebrate their differences and become the fullest expression of who they are sexually.
- where female genital mutilation (FGM) is not a thing anymore and women can feel pleasure when they have sex and not risk dying from childbirth. I give a portion of every sale to The Edna Adan Hospital to help train midwives in Somaliland and to help end FGM.
Things That Bring Me Pleasure (that Aren't About Sex)
I ride my bike, Calypso, almost everywhere I go. In fact, I sold my car this summer and I bike year round.
I love popcorn. I eat it almost daily.
I am learning American Sign Language (ASL) so I can communicate with people who are deaf and hard of hearing. I'm hoping to be fluent enough to coach about sexuality in ASL.
I take belly dance lessons. I'm not good at it but I feel so feminine and sexy (and awkward) all at the same time.
I am a big fan of The Nationals baseball team.
I love to cook and bake. I love making home made pasta and ice cream and cake. (But I hate eating cake. It has a weird consistency to me)
I love Afro beats music especially Timaya, HarrySong, Small Doctor, Davido and Flavour. You can hear their music if you follow me on Spotify.
The Gen SeXologist
“Renée shares personal information which levels the playing field and shows vulnerability and builds trust”
The Gen SeXologist
“I can't wait to share the Graphic Sex Project exercise with my partner. Now I finally know how to talk to him about what I want sexually.”
The Gen SeXologist
“She showed me three awesome techniques on how to communicate with my wife about what I want sexually in our relationship”
Have Better Sex Workshop $250.00
“My session with Renee was awesome - it was easy to speak openly about sex and my pleasure and making my graphs was so much fun!”